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After nine years in the army They took away his brain They tattooed "defect" on his brow And signed him up again He killed ten thousand germans A hundred japanese A family of hindus And a lot of portugese Nine plan failed I could never see the point Of showing them youre boss When they drag you through the city streets And naii you to a cross They took him to the office They strapped him to the bed They fastened lots of pretty wires Securely to his head They wheeled him down the corridor Upon a metal trolley Now he wears big spectacles And he sings like buddy holly Nine plan failed I could never see the point Of showing them youre boss When they drag you through the city streets And nail you to a cross The world declared its armistice And took away his guns And now he satisfies himself On piss-weak tea and buns On piss-weak tea and buns Oh oh At the disco Rome is very pretty And rome is very grand But the pope lost his four fingers When they gave this boy his hand to kiss When they gave this boy his hand to kiss It wasnt funny no He wasnt very good at school His highest grade was c But he believed the managers When they said:- "you leave it all to me" They gave him suits from saville row The quality so fine So now he sits in the desert wastes Just waiting for a sign Nine plan failed
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