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Dont send any money! Fate has no price Ignore at your peril this splendid advice An invaluable link in an infinite chain An offer like this will just not come again You wish you had women to charm and bewitch Power of life and death over the rich young girls will be swooning Because youre exciting them And not only fall at your feet but be biting them Guaranteed, guaranteed to capture your breath Or just possibly scare you to death Sign it and seal it and send it to friends But dont mention my name Dont make any long term plans In thirty-six hours your fortunes will change Your best friends wont know you And neither will strangers Do not keep this letter It must leave your hand You have been selected from over five thousand A twister or dupe will bamboozle or hoodwink you I cant say more it would only confuse you The wine that they offer will go to your head And youll start to see double in fishes and bread Guaranteed, guaranteed for a lifetime or more Guaranteed, for this world and the next Guaranteed, guaranteed for the world and its mother Cherish this life as you dont get another one Unless you should take up this fabulous offer Dont leave it too late or youll be bound to suffer And woebetide anyone so woebegone You wont know youre born or about to pass on Youll never get tired Youll never get bored By the way I just hope youre insured And if youre not satisfied If you want more We can always provide an improved overture Guaranteed at a price that is almost unbeatable This offer is unrepeatable Your trouble will vanish Your tears will dry Your blessing will just multiply Guaranteed at a price that is almost unbeatable This offer is unrepeatable Guaranteed, guaranteed to bring fortune and favor In a riot of colours, (a variety of) and flavours Guaranteed at a price that is almost unbeatable This offer is unrepeatable Would I lie to you? would I sell you a dud? Just sign on the line. could you possibly write it in blood?
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