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By Donald Pleasence and Meira Pleasence SNOW UP YOUR NOSE FOR CHRISTMAS, ICE ON YOUR PAWS AND YOUR CLAWS. TING-A-LING, TING-A-LING, TING-A-LING, LEARN TO SING, AN ANIMAL`S CHRISTMAS FIT FOR A KING. DING-DING-DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING. DING-DING-DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING. IT`S NOT THE BEST DAY OF THE YEAR FOR A DUCK OR A GOOSE OR A DEER. LITTLE CHICKS CAN GET KILLED, FATHER GEESE, I AM TOLD, HATE THE SIGHT OF THE SNOW AND THE RICH CHRISTMAS CHILL. DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING-A-LING... DIALOG: "LOOK! LOOK! THE JOLLIES` ON TV! THERE`S MOLLY JOLLY AND THERE`S HOLLY JOLLY AND THE ELECTRIC GUITAR, AND MISTER WALLY JOLLY STANDING ON HIS HEAD AND PLAYING THE TROMBONE AT THE SAME TIME!" "WHO`S THE GIRL?" "POLLY JOLLY!" DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING. SNOW UP YOUR NOSE FOR CHRISTMAS, SNOW FOR A FAT SANTA CLAUS. THERE IS SNOW UP YOUR NOSE, THERE IS ICE ON HIS TOES, PEOPLE GETS PRESENTS WHEREVER HE GOES. DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING. DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING-A-LING, DING-A-LING, DING-A-LING. SNOW UP YOUR NOSE, WIND ON YOUR FACE, SNOW UP YOUR NOSE ON THE WHOLE HUMAN RACE. DIALOG: MIDNIGHT, THE FAMILY WENT TO BED. "I`M OUT! COME ON, BONCE, FOOD!" THEY ATE CHRISTMAS CAKE, MINTS PIES, CHEESE. "CAN`T WE PULL ONE?" "A CRACKER?" "WELL, THEY`RE ALL ASLEEP, LISTEN!" THE TWO MICE PULLED, THE CRACKER PARTED WITH A BANG. THERE WAS SILENCE ABOVE THEM, QUIET AS CHOCOLATE MICE. THE MICE LISTENED. "LET`S SEE WHAT`S INSIDE." "LITTLE BAG!" "BRITISH AIRWAYS! JUST THE THING FOR OUR SURVIVAL KIT." HE FILLED THE TOY BAG WITH CHEESE AND CAKE AND JUMPED TO THE FLOOR. "WE`RE AWAY!" BONCE NOSED HIS WAY THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR LIKE AN ELECTRIC DRILL. "AFTER YOU, SCOUSE." SCOUSE PUT HIS NOSE INTO THE OUTSIDE WORLD. "OH, OH, IT`S, IT`S, IT`S COLD OUT THERE! AND THERE`S WHITE STUFF, SNOW, I THINK." "OH, SCOUSE, I THINK I`LL STAY HOME." "YOU CALL THIS HOME? LISTEN, YOU CAN ALWAYS JOIN ME. WATCH THE TELLY, I`LL BE THERE." "HOW?" "I`LL BE FAMOUS! FAMOUS PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS ON THE TELLY." "WELL, GOOD LUCK THEN. BYE." "EH...RIGHT!" HE WENT. SCOUSE THE MOUSE WAS FREE.
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