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Met this fine young thing at the local Circle K. She made a date for a half past eight, and I said, "What the hey." So I journeyed to her crib, and I let myself inside. That chick was slouched down on the couch. I think her brain was fried. Couldn`t figure it out, she wouldn`t even look at me. Then I saw her eyes, she was hypnotized. Cold glued to her TV. Said, "What`s your problem, baby doll? Let`s have a little fling." She said, "Hey, you fool, now just be cool. I`m watchin` that Gilligan`s Isle Thing." Isle Thing. Isle Thing. Watchin` all night. Must`ve been a marathon. I was bummin`, those shows kept comin`. Here`s what was goin` on. These castaways were stranded on this island out at sea. One of `em called Gilligan said, "Let`s name it after me!" He`d mess up every rescue. Man, that first mate was illin`. If I was one of them castaways, I think I`d probably kill him. Just about that time, the telephone began to ring. She said, "Just let it, my machine`ll get it. We`re watchin` the Gilligan`s Isle Thing." Isle Thing. She loves that Gilligan`s Isle Thing. Isle Thing. Please, baby baby, please. I liked the professor. He always saved their butts. He could build a nuclear reactor from a couple of coconuts. She said, "That guy`s a genius." I shook my head and laughed. I said, "If he`s so fly, then tell me why he couldn`t build a lousy raft? And while we`re on the subject, I`ll tell you one thing for sure. Those homeboys brought an awful lot for just a three-hour tour." Then her mom came in the room. It was kind of embarrassing. She said, "Hey, you two, I was once like you, And I love that Gilligan`s Isle Thing." Isle Thing. She`d watch that Gilligan`s Isle Thing. Please, baby baby, please. Skipper`s in a hammock. He`s lookin` kinda fat. He`d throw a fit and then he`d hit ol` Gilligan with his hat. Mrs. Howell got it goin` on, but Mr. Howell was meaner. Ginger and Mary Ann could`ve used some funky cold medina. I was really diggin` this show. I didn`t know what to do. It kinda looked like I was hooked. Now I`m an addict too. I know each episode by heart. Now I`m the Rerun King. And on every date we both say up late, And watch the Gilligan`s Isle Thing. Isle Thing. Hasta la vista, Little Buddy. Gilligan`s Isle Thing.
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